June 19, 2011


Not sure where to start to really do this gift justice. I want to create something sincere and honest, something that in some way articulates all the things I so often have a difficult time expressing. I am not even sure whether to write directly to you, or to some nebulous audience of strangers and friends. What says,"I love you and appreciate you" best? A poem? Some pictures? Telling our story publicly? A whisper as we fall asleep? Maybe the best thing in a compilation of all these things.

The funny thing about dates and anniversaries is that they only celebrate and highlight that one moment in time, and for us that moment was seven years ago in Las Vegas, as we gathered with friends, had a great time, and committed ourselves to each other. While June 19th, 2004 and the weekend that tagged along with it were so much fun, they don't necessarily capture the amazing ride we have been on since or before.

Wedding Chapel in Vegas
Even though we can say that we have been married for seven years, we both know that a truer date would be sometime in 2000 when we lived together in this tiny little hut in Mozambique. Because it was during those days and nights of peeling garlic and wasting away hours in books and conversations that we were really married.

Our House For Two Years in Mozambique
How can one anniversary date ever capture our travels: Paris, Dominican Republic, Costa Rica, Hawaii, Tunisia, Vietnam, Laos, Malaysia? The list goes on and on. How can this one date capture the life we have built or the two amazing daughters we are raising? How can the date ever express the love and dedication we have shown to the building of  this fine tuned team we have become?

The other day in the car, my mind was a drift, as it often is, and this thought danced into my mind, "It is not love if it is hard work." It made me think about how easy it is to be with you. How easy it is to simply be myself around you. Perhaps it is more romantic to see love as a passionate series of struggles and arguments, but I love the simplicity of our relationship.  People often joke about domestication and the sacrifices that come with marriage, but honestly I have never felt that way about our relationship. We simply are ourselves. Sure,  I have changed dramatically since I met you, but it has all been for the better and because I have wanted, ney, needed to make these changes. You have helped me discover the man I have always wanted to be. You bring out the best in me and challenge me to be the best husband and father I can be. And for that I thank you.

So is this spiel, this rant, this disjointed blog post doing our anniversary justice? I am quiet certain that it is not, but how can it? Would flowers, a ring, or other gifts be better? How can anything, but the very fabric our our lives really show the power of our well functioning marriage? All I can say is that I love you, probably more so than I did seven years ago, even more than I did ten years ago. Our time together is aging like a fine wine. Each day, I notice a hidden flavor here, a lost tannin there. I may not say it often enough, claiming to be too busy with "real life" but you are more than my wife-You are my best friend, my partner, and I am so thankful that you help me grow. Despite the long days, the tantrums, and quiet nights I still look at you like this:

I made a little video, and found it so funny that we don't have as many of these couple pictures since the girls were born, but fear not we can start taking them again when they are older and we pick up where we left off.

I hope this little public rambling is enough to remind you how much I need you. Apparently the "proper" gift for the seventh anniversary is copper and wool. Really? A suggestion was a desk set. How about a great month in Thailand and a life time of doing what we are doing instead?

Oh! Are the readers still here? If you know Mairin and I as a couple, leave some kind words and let's commemorate this special occasion. If you can try and incorporate some kind of copper or wool into your comments that would be great.

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