April 4, 2016

I Wish I Knew

I love TV. I love talking about it. I love reading about it. I love watching television and I always have. It is my American right to love the stuff. I was raised on it. I loved watching Silver Spoons and Different Strokes and Who’s The Boss and staying home from school to watch I Dream Of Jennie and Bewitched. I loved watching Three’s Company with my Iranian grandmother and Love Boat with my mom.


You can say that TV is making us dumb, but I won’t deny my love. I binge watch The Sopranos and Mad Men and Game of Thrones. I like the smart stuff, the artsy stuff and even the dumb stuff. I love television. I love following the arcs and exploring the sets and listening to the music and noticing the glassware and the costumes and deconstructing the scripts and marveling at the acting and falling in love with the characters and being crushed when a series end and freaking out when new love affairs begin.


I love watching TV with Mairin and on my own. I love staying home on a Friday night to watch a show or looking forward all week to a night when our shows are released. I even like some reality TV. Monday nights are good TV nights for us these days in Singapore.


Tonight we put the kids to bed and cracked open two bottles of wine- one white the other red. Sure we are a middle aged cliche, but the Walking Dead season finale was on and I could give two shits about being predictable. Did I mention I love TV? We watched and gasped and loved it and hated it. There was so much to appreciate and even more to criticise. We are six years invested into these characters and so we demand a lot. I read reviews and suggested improvements. I am not sure where I am with the show, but I know I'm still in.


Then we watched Girls. Another show I adore. I thought about the color palette and how sophisticated the show is looking in season five. The directing and writing is at a zenith these days and it is beautiful how much they can pack into an episode.


I wish there was a way that I could work on a TV show. I wish there was a way that I could take a year to teach middle school students how to write an 11 episode TV series. That is all we would do. We would watch and learn and copy and write and shoot and fall in love with TV. I am not sure how to write a TV show, but I know what I know and what I love and what I can teach and I think I can teach kids how to write and how to shoot and how to create.


(Side note- I love watching gay men kissing on TV, because although in the past it has made me feel “weird” I think the more we see gay people on TV being themselves, the closer we will come to understanding love and humanity and all the things we find so hard to understand.)


Then we watched Togetherness. One of my favorite shows, only to find out that next week is the series finale. Series! WTF? Really two seasons and that is from the Duplass brothers? This show is gold. If you are not watching it than get on it. If you are forty-two and slightly buzzed on red wine on a Monday night, and listening to the first Bon Iver album and wondering if you are cool or lame and swimming in words, then this might be a show for you.


I love TV and tonight was a night to spend with my love.


The rest of the day was uneventful- got home. Ignored the kids for most of the day. Let them re-acquaint themselves with themselves, their rooms and their toys. I lounged on my bed, played a lot of guitar, took a shower and poked around the internet on my phone. We had dinner at Bergs and oh-did I mention the TV?



Last night I wrote about my desire to Jet Ski. This got me thinking about other things I want.


I tend to paint myself as a non-consumerist type, and while it is true that I try to not give in to all my materialistic desires, I am still, like everyone else, mired in the consumerist societal assault on what I should want. Here is a partial list of what I want if I had all the money in the world:


A long board. Yup, a long board skate board to ride up and down East Coast park. I will also need a pair of “real” sunglasses. I am thinking a pair of Ray Ban Way Fares ala Bob Dylan in the 1966 black and white era, the time he was tight with Allen Ginsberg. I also want some kind of hat other than a baseball cap. I am thinking fedora, but not so wooly or beaver hair or whatever those things are made of. I want straw, but not the kind every other douchy middle aged guy has. I want to be cool and original, but I have no idea what that means anymore, so maybe I just want a cool hat and sunglasses and my long board.


I want this miniature guitar I saw at the music store. It is the size of a ukulele but has six strings and is tuned like a guitar. I want it for travel and hotel rooms. I want to cover it in stickers, because I don’t like stickers on my real guitar. I want a case for said guitar and I want to take it with me wherever I go. I may want to add pick ups on it so I can plug it in, so I might want a small amp and maybe a few effect pedals. As long as I am wanting in this field, I want a full Marshall stack and a Gibson SG ala Soundgarden and Black Sabbath. I want a mandolin and a clarinet.


I want new headphones and a Go Pro or similar waterproof camera. I want a bigger TV and an Xbox. I want fancier shoes and a better wardrobe. I want to be able to pull off a man scarf. I want a monthly massage package and a custom made back suit ala Vinny Chase. I want books and books and more books. I want a record player and every Pearl Jam record on vinyl. I want one of their tour posters in a frame, maybe the one fro the Golden Park show where Vedder passed out after four songs. I want better speakers and surround sound system for my movies. I want the new Apple TV and a better set of pots and pans. I want a knife block and a set of whiskey drinking tumblers. I want a fully stocked bar and a set of scotch bottles from duty free. I want Martini glasses and my own pickled onions like I had in NYC. I want the house painted in warm maroons and blues, and I want more art on the walls and a new car- something green and sustainable, maybe a Prius.


I want more tattoos- full sleeves, shoulders and back. I want to get my ears pierced. I want an herb garden and bigger trees for every balcony. I want new curtains and a new love seat. I want that funky clock and a display case for the lego. I want more lego, especially that 1968 VW bus. I want a nice set of color pencils and a new a new a new a new……I want. I want a new……I wish I knew.

1 comment:

  1. What a grand riff rant! I loved the rhythm of the "I wants" the mixture of what might be desires and not. Who knows? (well you do)

    I have one of those 6 string ukeleles - its a Yamaha Guitalele though I have heard it called a Uke-itar. I makes for a carry on travel guitar, though tuned for guitar the strings are loose so tuning is always happening. The frets are tight with my clumsy fingers. But I tell you, carrying it always starts conversations. Other guitar players always want to know whats i the case, and then they will share what they play. Other people will ask, "Are you performing in town?" Its something about the odd size which suggests to people it might be a rare instrument, not an inexpensive shrunken guitar.

    But now i know... I want a pick-up for it.

    You are on fire, keep burning.

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