September 21, 2016

Potty Mouth

Set Scene: Morning. Early. Still dark outside. Two kids in their pajamas sit at the breakfast table barely awake. Their hair is a mess and their eyes barely open. They will eat some veggie sausage, fruit, toast and a calcium supplement. Chocolate flavoured. Their dad is sitting at the table making sure that they are able to eat this simple meal in the 30 mins that have been allotted to the eating of breakfast. Some mornings this is a battle. Some days it is fine.

The dad holds a guitar and fiddles with some chords. A little riff from some Pearl jam song. It is soft and in the background. After several minutes of quiet and chewing, the girls are more awake. They younger one, aged six, begins to talk. Her name is Skye. The father will be known as dad.

S- You know the songs you put on my bedtime playlist have bad words in them.
D- Not all of them only a few.
S- Well one of them says the F-word. I heard it last night.

The child is referring to the a Spotify playlist called Mellow Breakfast Tunes that the family has now begun to use as lullaby music for the younger child. It includes such artists as Ben Harper, Gillian Welch, Cloud Cult and more. The song to which is she is referring is called Broadripple is Burning by Margot and The Nuclear So and Sos. The lines in questions are:

And don't fucking move,
'Cause everything you thought you had will go to shit.
We've got a lot.
Don't you dare forget that.

D- Well there are really no such things as “bad words.” There are words that are inappropriate at certain times by certain people, but no word is bad just by itself. For example if I use a harsh word to make someone feel bad or if I use it to attack someone, then this is a bad word and should not be used. Or if I do not know what a word means, and I do not know its power and by using it might really hurt someone’s feelings than it is probably a pretty bad word.

That is why kids shouldn’t use these words, because you don’t know what they mean and can’t understand their power. So you can really hurt people. Beside it sounds rude to use inappropriate language in front of others.

Adults know what the words mean and we know when to use them, so for us they are not ever really bad words. I love those words. I use them quite often in the right settings.

S- But is it okay for me to hear them in songs?

D- I don’t think it is bad. You will grow into them. I don’t want you to use them until you are ready, but I don't think it will kill you to hear them. I don’t want you to use them at school, in front of your friends or teachers, for all the reasons we talked about, because I want you to respect their power.

The older child is slowly eating, just listening, which is rare for her. She considers how she is on the threshold of this new power and wonders when she might begin to grow out of the S-Word and into shit.

D- Sometimes kids Kaia's age feel special or rebellious when they use these words on the playground or among their friends, but really they too should wait for a few years before they can really use them correctly and understand their full meaning and power.

The dad looks to see if his little side note was received. The older child looks up and acknowledges his words.

The family finishes breakfast, takes their showers and make it to school on time.

For the record, I have a post about #blacklivesmatter, the national anthem fiascos, #terrycutcher and more, but I am waiting for my anger to subside a bit so I am not writing from a reactionary point of view.

Oh and that whole Skittles thing is so insanely infuriating it makes you want to swear your head off.

Had a healthy run today. Got up to about 8km and felt pretty good for the first half. Still walking a lot, but feeling fresher than before. I am almost didn’t go, but I am so glad I did. Running is always better then not running.

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