Chicken for Supper

Just a quick intro to set the stage for the following video. I met Leslie for the first time in Shanghai last September at a tech conference. She had crashed the event, but was soon one of our gang. We shared many a meal, sang songs, and connected on some bizarre dimension I find difficult to describe.

Once home we continued to chat on Twitter, share blog posts, but most importantly we collaborated on several movie and music projects. She plays a mean ukulele and sings vocals on a few of my songs. She did an amazing cover of one my original songs. In short, Leslie is a kindred spirit and far flung global band member. She is good people and one of the amazing success stories of my network. I look forward to the next time we meet, as I think we have much more to talk about since our initial meeting in Shanghai. I consider her a good friend and great conspirator. She is both a fan and a mentor. If you have never had a relationship like this, trust me your are missing out.

A few weeks ago she asked me my thoughts on vegetarianism, so I sent her this link. Today she sent me the video below. Please take a look. I have added a few thoughts below the clip.



Thanks for this Leslie. I think you have raised a very important idea to consider- food identity. Or better said a conscious food identity. I agree that no matter what choices we make, when it comes to our food, it is important that we have a conscious awareness as to why we are making the choices we make. I am vegetarian for a variety of reason, but I still suffer from a deep guilt because I am not vegan. I understand the callous, cruel, and irresponsible world of the global industrial food chain, but for reasons of weakness and an unexplainable hypocrisy I continue to eat dairy. It is important to remember that each person is on their own journey. All we can do is try to raise awareness and help people make socially considerate decisions.

Like you mentioned in the video in regards to your own meat eating, I know that eating dairy is wrong, but I choose to do it anyway. Some could argue that my actions in the face of awareness is worse than not knowing at all, and they may be right. But I see my food identity, like everything else in my life, as an evolving journey.  Personal growth is all we can ask from people. 

Your video does a great job of exposing feelings and thoughts that many purposefully hide. I love how you have approached a difficult subject in a light and easily accessible way. Like you,  I think that people would make different choices if they were faced with the act of butchering. While living in Africa, I sometimes ate chicken and turkey because I was able to butcher the animal myself. My philosophy was that if I could kill and prepare the animal myself than it was okay. I was able to murder chicken and fish, but could not do the deed when it came to larger mammals. This act of killing and eating animals myself was a very powerful experience for me. I can respect people who farm or hunt and butcher their own meat. I can respect the relationship people have with animals before they eat them.

What I  have a hard time with is the industrial system. I know it goes beyond the meat industry, anyone who has seen Food Inc or read The Omnivore’s Dilemma can attest to how screwed we are as a planet, and how we have allowed industrialization and commercialism to sour our most basic freedoms, but…..arghhhh I don’t know when it all became so complicated.

At the end of the day, I just think the act of eating flesh is gross.  I think that murder in any shape is violent, and I for one, am trying to find peace in my heart. The act of not eating meat is an easy way I can fool myself into thinking I am doing something right. I do not miss it. For me, it is not a sacrifice. It is simply who I am. It is beyond my food identity. I cannot even imagine what it would feel like to put flesh in my mouth. I hope that some day soon, I can say the same thing about dairy.

Thanks for making me take a few minutes to write out these words and think these thoughts. Videos like yours are important.

What do you people think? I hope post doesn’t turn into a us versus them comment thread. It would be nice to hear what people think about their own food identities and food choices. This is not about right or wrong or conversion from one side to the next, it is about thinking about the choices we each make. So please share some thoughts below.

Arrived

I sat in this room back when I was that other person. I think it was five years ago. Maybe more. Maybe less, the past is nebulous that way. It was the end of an era, of sorts, maybe it was the beginning. Who can tell? We were in Saigon, or do I call it Ho Chi Minh. They say the way we name things is important. Some tripe about language, but who can tell what they are callings things these days.

In those days, as well as all the other days, I thought of these days. The wispy streams of consciousness we call past, present, and future. Time another one of those pesky ideas we have mislabeled. Or is it they who name our language. Maybe it’s me. Words never seem enough. 

I am alone at The Spring hotel, I think the same room we had last time we were here. I have my computer, all my music, a solid connection to the Internet (Read: The world) and a nagging need to wrap my world in words. I have nowhere to be, no one to meet, and no one to be. Feels nice.

I am letting my brain run a bit. Stretch out its legs. Write a bit. Call friends on Skype and actually show them what is happening. As a young man I often romanticized the men who sit alone in strange rooms with the need to turn themselves inside out. I marveled at the power they wielded to be ideas changers, world shifters, to be writers! I was in love with the vision of my heroes, of my our fathers -Men like Hunter S. Thompson and Henry Miller, Charles Bukowski, let's not forget Steinbeck and Dostoevsky sitting in rooms dipped in madness.

But as, I watched the sunlight move a slow geometric dance on the desk, I look around and notice I am here. I have arrived. I am who I have always dreamed of being. Leonard Cohen softly fills the room and these words slowly drip out. Trouble is, now all I want is to be home to hold my wife and play with my kids.

Happiness how can we express that with words?

Inside Out

I got a heavy metal mouth that hurls obscenity
And I get my check in from the trash treasury
Because I took my own insides out

Elliot Smith

Make a photograph from an unusual point of view.

Sweet Potato Ice Cream

My mind is a buzz with ice cream flavors! Having already had some success with mint, I wanted to try something a bit more exotic. I had this idea of this pumpkin pie idea, but pumpkin is hard to find here in Indonesia, so I decided to go with sweet potato instead. I also wanted candied pecans for texture, but couldn't find those either. Let's walk through the process, look at some pictures, and discuss what worked and what didn't.

First problem was that the Japanese sweet potatoes I found were not as orange or as sweet as I would have liked. They had more of a potato flavor and I was worried that my ice cream would taste more like french fries and less like a sweet pie. I thought I would simply sweeten them with some maple syrup, so I carried on and began boiling the bad boys up!

Looking a bit more rosy, but the flavor was still not there.

I peeled them, whisked my yolks and prepared my custard.

I am learning more about custard. There is a trick to making it creamy and it involves a steady warm heat so the eggs don't cook or curdle, but turn into a creamy custard. There is a lot of stirring involved.

I mixed in the potatoes and the custard and into the ice cream maker it all went. I also added some syrup for sweetness, cinnamon, nutmeg, and a bit of fresh ginger. Even a tiny bit was too much and nearly cut all the sweetness I had created.

Finally, I still needed some crunch so I caramelized some sugar candy like my grandmother used to make and sprinkled it on top.

All in all it is not bad, but not as creamy as my previous my batch. I am pretty sure this has to do with the denisty of the potatoes. It is also pretty hardy. A whole bowl feels a bit like having a meal, so this might be best on a slice of apple pie or something. I would be interested in trying this again with really sweet orange potatoes next time. Not bad for my first time and it will be yummy to eat, but not as good as the mint.

I want to try a nut based flavor next. I am thinking pistachio or almond, but I have no idea what that entails. I also found some rose water and as soon as I can afford some Saffron, I can make some Persian ice cream which is delicious.

Do you have any flavor ideas?

Symmetry

I raise my glass to symmetry
To the second hand and its accuracy
To the actual size of everything
The desert is the sand
You can't hold it in your hand
It won't bow to your demands
There's no difference you can make
There's no difference you can make
And if it seems like an accident
A collage of senselessness
You weren't looking hard enough
I wasn't looking hard enough at it

Bright Eyes

Illustrate symmetry in a photograph today.

Process

It's all part of the process
We all love looking down
All we want is some success
But the chance is never around

Morcheeba

Make a photograph of a symbol today.

Attraction

It's as simple as something that nobody knows
That her eyes are as big as her bubbly toes
Jack Johnson

Illustrate attraction in a photograph today.

Taking Requests

Every Saturday morning my wife goes grocery shopping with Kaia, while I watch our youngest. I usually spend that time messing with my guitar and singing as loudly as I can, since I cannot really do that when people are home.

This week I took a few requests from Twitter. Nothing spectacular, but had some fun strumming about.

Freebird- Called a bluff by Msstewart

Was reminded how much I love Boss DJ by Sublime by cristinamoreno



And struggled my way through one of my favorites by Pearl Jam thanks to John Spencer



There is nothing here that will get me a record deal, but it was a fun way to sing and connect with a few random people out there. I hope to record a better version of Boss DJ soon. I really like it and think I could do it some justice with some practice. Thanks everyone who played along.

We Lead And Are Led

At some point in the nineteen nineties I was registered for a political science class at Mesa College in San Diego. I don’t remember any thing I learned from my time there besides how to consume large amounts of alcohol on a very limited budget. I was little more than a ghost hunched in the back corner trying to stay awake. I am not sure why I ever went to class, as I do not remember ever taking a single note, doing any assignments, or even paying for classes. I was on the winning side of my twenties and fueled by a rage I could not name.

I only bring this up because at some point during the haze that was my experience at Mesa College, I remember the professor, or whatever you call people at community college said, “Politics is the study of power.” That simple statement has stuck with me ever since. Through all my years of schooling that is the first statement that comes to mind when I recall what I have learned. Years of my own experiences later I have also learned that politics on any given level is the ability of one person to exert his or her power to make another person or other people to do something. So in this sense the human experience is a series of political experiences. The constant shifting and balancing of power- within a psyche, a relationship, a marriage, a family, a school, a community, states, nations, the world.

By understanding politics on such an intimate level, I feel I have been better able to understand politics on a larger scale. I do not understand people who claim not to understand or be interested in politics. To utter such a statement is to claim not to be interested in or to feel one is affected by the movement of power. We are all constantly perpetrators of political jostling from the moment we are born till we die. We begin as children, and depending on which set of cultural baggage we are forced to carry, are given a small amount of political capital. 

As we grow older, we challenge, fight back, acquiescence. We rebel and conform. We are schooled. We are broken. We are radicalized.  We are jailed. We are taught. We lead and are led. Life is nothing more than our individual balancing act of political clout. We join together in unions to demand better wages. We join together to stop wars, or we stand alone to stop abortion with a gun. A single gun can carry more political punch than a well-organized herd.

We marry. We divorce. We raise families. We join school boards. We tune out and shop and give our power away. We demand it back when left holding a heavy bag of emptiness. We are all political. We have no choice. There is no reason why we should shy away from politics. There is no reason why we should feel it is beyond us, or that we are not involved. You are either pushing or being pushed. That is politics, either way you are involved. I am involved.

Sorry for this lengthy introduction, but I needed to clear my head a bit before I jumped into my Audacity of Hope post. Yes, I have finished the eloquent manifesto written by Barack Obama, and I am proud to say that I am a better person for having done so. I would recommend this book to every American, or person trying to understand America in the modern age.

There are so many directions I want to take this post, but my eagerness and lack of focus will force me to take you on a somewhat wild ride of thoughts, ideas, and epiphanies. I apologize in advance. If you are looking for a well-organized five-paragraph essay, I suggest you look elsewhere. I do, however, hope that you will join me as I work through some ideas through text.

Let’s start with values. We have them. We lose them. We need them. Everyone…wait, let this post not deal with grand ideas of you and them and everyone else, let it simply deal with me. I like to think I have a core set of values that guide my life. I like to think that these values are clear and that I stick to them. I like to think that I am a moral man and that I am passing my values onto my family, my friends and my students. I begrudge others when they “sell-out” or turn their backs on their values, but the truth of the matter is, if asked to name my values I am not sure what they are. I have not thought deeply enough about them. Of course there is a loose cloud of ideas that I hold dear.

I am a big fan of the Golden Rule. I believe in treating others, regardless of their class or status with respect, honesty and trust until they prove unworthy. I believe in honesty, fairness, self-reliance, self-improvement, risk-taking, creativity, personal responsibility, humility, kindness, and compassion. The list could go on and on and for me it seems to do just that, but what does it mean to say you value humility? What does it meant to claim to be a compassionate person? Is it responsible of me to continue behaviors I know are causing damage to my environment? Which values are most important to me? How am I making sure that I am not simply paying lip service to this nebulous list of values? (There will be an upcoming series of post that explore my values which may be the backbone of my memoir)

This close look at my own personal values is the single biggest lesson I learned from Obama’s book. It is easy to stand on a soapbox and begrudge a politician for not doing the “right” thing. Who hasn’t acted the hypocrite when they judge the actions of others before looking closer at their own actions and deliverance of values?

I would often challenge leaders by asking them where they put their time, energy, and money. Those are the true tests of what we value, I’d tell them, regardless of what we like to tell ourselves. If we aren’t willing to pay a price for our values, if we aren’t willing to make some sacrifices in order to realize them, then we should ask ourselves whether we truly believe in them at all. 

My first reaction was that of glass-house stone-thrower. “Come on Obama! Where have you been putting you time, energy, and money?” The cynic in me could list page after page of incidences when Obama has betrayed his values through his actions, but as Ari reminded me last month, who am I to speak on the actions of others before I have put my own house of values in order. What are my values? What do I sacrifice? Where is my time, my energy, and my money being spent?

Suddenly, I am the blowhard anti-corporatist who works at a profit driven corporate school educating the very class I so often deride. Suddenly,  I am the environmentalist who travels by airplane three or four times a year. Suddenly, I am the compassionate person who drives by street kids in Jakarta hoping my daughter doesn’t ask me why. Suddenly, I am the vegetarian making ice cream using eggs and milk. Suddenly, I am the sell-out. It is much easier to project our values on politicians only to attack them when they let us down, then to look hard in the mirror and make sacrifices and choices that truly reflect for our values.

This simple realization made me see Obama as a human being. I put myself in his shoes and wondered how I would be attacked for my shortcomings. Before reading this book, I saw him as a shrewd manipulated/manipulative brand designed to assuage the left wing of American politics, and while this may still be true, I now see that beneath the veneer of the messiah is a man. A man who seems to share many of my values. A man who is on a similar path of growth and understanding. A man who may have chosen the wrong profession.

I will save that for next time. This book has made me think that perhaps the American political system is beyond repair, that perhaps a new form of government is needed, but that train of thought must leave a different station. For now, this book has me seriously rethinking my own values and politics. I will continue to use this space to work through my journey. Thanks for listening. Got any ideas? Share’em below.