September 8, 2016

Unwilling

Some nights I want to sit at this machine, stare at the blank page and create magic. I hope that it will just come pouring out, some kind of inspirational BS that people relate to. Or maybe I just need the space and time to stir myself around with words, so I can settle in for the night and watch the particles settle back down in the still water.


But on some nights, the words demand too much care. Too much attention. There is a level of effort that comes from making sense. Of creating meaning. Of carving out….see? Sometimes the words just don’t come. They are entrenched into the bedrock, unwilling to shine.


Tonight, is one of those nights- the ideas are like swirling dust in a storm. I want to gather them. To capture them and wrap them with syntax, but the conflicting metaphors becoming confusing. The very act of slowing down and writing becomes too tedious a chore and on nights like this, the work is not for anyone to read. Words that are forced seldom become relatable or even readable. But when you make a promise to give it a go every night, then some of them will be duds.


I would love to breath and relax and slow down and do the work, but honestly I just need to watch some Seth Meyers, reconnect with the absurdity of the world, maybe read and get to sleep. I am not jet lagged, but the switching of my million hats has me spinning, to the point where I am not sure where I will land.





We had our first Off Tangent Lit magazine meeting today and we had 20+ students show up. We did some introductory exercises and I saw one girl smiling from ear-to-ear and actually pump her fists as we spoke about the purpose of the magazine- to inspire and empower young readers and writers who love words and stories. I am so proud of the community we created last year and this new group feels just as inspirational. The young leaders we trained were back this year and looking focused and learned and determined. There is nothing like student empowerment and passion. We do more teaching in this activity than most of our classes. So glad to be working on something I love with Paula again this year.





Been messing with Ghost in You by The Psychedelic Furs, and even though I am basically talking through the song, it feels nice to get my fingers around it.





Friday of a three day weekend up ahead and looking forward to some downtime that doesn’t involve killing time in an airport or an airplane.

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