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it’s hard to tell
what allows men
into each other’s lives,
what with the insecurity
and false masculinity.
 
adolescent alcoholism,  
reckless desperation,
being wanted
(needed)
(noticed)
is what did it
for these two.
that and:

lack of fear.
no judgement.
drunken walks.
exploring selves.
unvarnished truth.

football games.
jabbanwhiches.
xmas shopping.
double dates.
sleeping in.
farting in groups.
talking shit.

ignoring speed limits.
chewing tobacco
driving to tahoe.
yearning for the edge.
altered states.

car crashes.
inner rage.
tears in hospitals.
take-out from work.
pushing wheel chairs
sharing journals.
catching dawns.

changing bandages.
sharing meds.
first time on the internet.
road trips.
car crashes.

long letters.
big distances.
years separated.
shared dreams.
opening schools.
hiring teachers.
sitting on decks.

meeting wives.
grieving deaths.
loving kids.

it’s hard to tell
what allows men
into each other’s lives.