River

Below you will find a song I wrote for my family. Beneath the song and the lyrics is a very raw, one take youtube clip. I hope to make a video with the polished song some day soon. I have been working on this all day and am physically, mentally, and spiritually drained. I hope this helps someone, somewhere. It has helped me deal with a very challenging day. My grandmother passed away today, last year and I have never mentioned it on this blog, because I never knew what to say or how to say it. Today this came to me...

River



It happened one year ago today
You were on the floor didn’t know what to say
(I couldn’t stop your pain)
I didn’t know how to stop the pain
a year’s gone by but it still remains

The river still flows on and on
(I can’t stop your pain)
The river flows on and on

Every time we talk on the phone
You tell me how she still feels so alone
(don’t be alone)
I still don’t know how to stop her pain
And a year’s gone by and it feels the same

The river still flows on and on
(I can’t stop your pain)
The river flows on and on
(I can’t stop your pain)

Tell her every flower wilts on the vine
So it’s best to make use of our time
(make use of your time)
I’m not sure if these words help her pain
a year’s gone by and we all still remain

The river still flows on and on
(I can’t stop your pain)
The river flows on and on

Tell her I still see her every day
(in every way)
In Kaia’ heart she will always remain
I’m not sure if songs can cure our pain
A year’s gone by and we all still remain

The river still flows on and on
(I can’t stop the pain)
The river flows on and on

Tell her she wouldn’t want to see us cry
(please don’t cry)
I know its hard but she’d want to see us try
(please go and cry)
I’m not sure if this song will help her pain
(It’s okay to cry)
why don’t songs heal our pain
(go ahead and cry)

the pain will go away.

Sleeping Lessons

We need a new anthem! I am not sure who the we is to which I am referring, but I know that I am a part of it and, if you want to be a part of it too, all you have to do is sing along:

Just put yourself in my new shoes,
And see that I do what I do,
Because the old guard still offend,
They got nothing left on which we depend.
So enlist every ounce
Of your bright blood,

And off with their heads.The Shins have given us the sacred song. You can’t go wrong with a song that uses the word eviscerate, starts of with a dreamy E A B chord progression, and ends in a Strokes influenced rhythm pattern. Sleeping Lessons will have you jumping around the room and smiling- as if you finally, after a lifetime of questions, have some sort of answer:

Jump from the hook,
You're not obliged to swallow
anything you despise

This song is as close to perfection as we are going to get. The entire album, Wincing The Night Away is phenomenal, but this opening track is the piece de resistance. I am not sure if I am breaking any laws here by embedding the song, but what the hell, take a listen for yourself!


You need Quicktime!

Self-Portrait- Album Cover (Unless You're Free)

Like everyone else at Self-Portrait Challenge, I was not too excited about this month’s challenge at first. I mean, how is it fun if everyone is using the same ten or fifteen tools? No offense but how many Hockney-inizer pics could we look at all month?

I had to think of a way to push this challenge in a new direction. I got to thinking. How could I stay with in the theme but also be creative? The first step was to stop using the tools provided. Sorry guys, but face morphing? Where is the fun in that? The computer is doing all the work. No, I decided to simply follow the prompt’s suggestion: enhance a photo using the computer. The tools they had provided were tempting, but I decided to use Photoshop. I am a novice when it comes to using this program, but I am always amazed at how much you can do with it. I am always learning new things, and I figured I could use this week’s challenge to push my Photoshop skills.

I decided to try my hand at computer graphics. We are surrounded by computer enhanced and created images. I wanted to see if I could create something that looked professional. I am always telling my wife that I want to go back to school and get a degree in some kind of computer art/photography/film making/ or music, so why not put my money where my mouth is and see what I could do.

The idea was to create an album cover for a fictitious CD. One that I hope I may produce someday. The beauty of this new technological age is that anyone can produce music/art and share it with a worldwide audience. But you already knew that or you wouldn’t be here. Back to the project. I had a vision in my head, and I am very proud to say that the final product is exactly as I saw it. There is something very gratifying in the notion that you can dream up something in your head then take a few photos, do some editing, cut and paste, play with layers and colors, and here you have it- a finished album cover; the latest EP from IntrepidFlame called We Are All Broken. I have also included the first single, an original, called Unless You’re Free.
If you have Quicktime, you are in luck. Simply click below to listen. If not download here.




Now that the first graphic is done, my brain is whirling with ideas. With Photoshop, you really can create any image you can think of, and believe me; I am thinking of quiet a few.

Self Portrait Challenge- Black and White Guitar

I‘ve always wanted to be the guy who can pull out a guitar at a party or a campfire and belt out a Cat Stevens song as people sway and hug as the night turns to morning. You know the type: calm, gifted, easy going, but a gaping lack of natural talent, the inability to sing in a key, and annoying levels of inhibition have rendered me a closet home musician and nothing more.

It sounds kind of sad when I say it out loud, but I have been playing the guitar for fourteen years now, and I don’t feel I am any better than when I started. Sure, I know the basic chords, and my fingers sometimes feel a bit more agile than they used to. But after fourteen years, you would think that I would be able sit in front of people and sing a few songs without fumbling through sheets of tablature.

Having admitted to my mediocrity, I want to state that I cannot put into words the pleasure I derive from sitting down for an hour and playing my guitar. Yes, I am awkward and clunky as I flip the pages of my tabs. Yes, when I record it seldom feels natural, like I know that it should. Yes, I go through ten takes. Yes, it comes hard to me. The verse is always a step ahead of the chords, and the chorus always two steps behind.

Even after fourteen years of of holding steady, I am certain of one thing- I was meant to play guitar and sing. Maybe not well, or in key, or in front of others, but I have to to sit in rooms and connect with the magic in the world that creates music. I simply cannot imagine life without that connection. Whenever I go out of town, the first thing I pick up when I get home is my guitar. The ruts that I had hit, and the repetitive chord progressions that frustrated me before leaving have all had time to dissolve, and I am left with a fresh canvas of notes. I allow my fingers to get comfortable and stumble over the strings, nestling up to the frets. There is no past or future when you create music. Suddenly, you discover a combination of chords that for some strange reason you had never assembled before, and you are alone with the universe in the present moment.

I am not sure if I will ever be the guy who can simply pull out the guitar and entertain a crowd, but at least now I have a new fan who loves to sit and watch daddy strum a few chords and sing, even if only he sings the words sha lala lala over a G F C chord progression.

Fourteen years of playing have gotten me this far. Which admittedly isn’t far at all. It has always been my dream to play in front of people, and last year, I played in front of about two hundred members of my school community. It was the most amazing feeling I have ever felt. It was a great first step. But even with that behind me, I can still barely play an open mic. (Although one is coming up and I am preparing to play.) I am not sure what it means to be a musician, but I do know that music is the most important thing in my life, and I want to be more than an observer. I want to participate in the magic. If I have learned anything on my journey so far, it is to simply do the things you love. Do them often and do them like you don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks. And so, I take my photographs, I write my poems and stories, I play my music, I paint my pictures. Simple as that. I am not looking to be famous anymore. I don’t want a record deal. I don’t need to be published. I simply want to create: For myself, for my daughter and for you: anyone out there who respects and appreciates people who live art because they have no choice. Art these days for me is simple honesty. It is vulnerability and self-exposure, and so I am in the process of reducing the things I have to hide. Who knows what is my most effective way of conveying what I mean. Is it these words? The image below? The vibrating of six strings? Or maybe it is the combination of all three. This all has to mean something, because it would be nice if it did. And if it doesn’t that’s okay too.